Sermon On Myself

God is Good All The Time. This is what I know. I did not learn that in Sunday School. I learned it after a long time of figuring out what I already knew. I couldn't run fast enough from it. It hung over my head like a thundercloud.

Most of the time I was on auto-pilot. Automatically engaged in self pleasure, self pride, and a way to make the running stop and the thunderclouds of guilt and despair go away. That would be be drinking, drugs and chasing women. Knowing , whenever I thought about it, Jesus was standing right beside me, with that look. Looking straight in me. I knew the truth and i refused it. I could do this on my own. I felt confident that no matter what since I knew who Jesus was at age 12 I was ok, I'm going to heaven. As I look into the years that laid ahead of me. From today's perspective. I was bound for hell. Knowing who Jesus is aint't KNOWING Jesus. As Savior, Lamb, King.

Then the physical and psychological pain. I went through life bullet proof. I could do it. Then in my 30's, life struck. ended up broken physically so badly I could no longer walk and plagued with Hepatitis C and Cancer. All within 18 months. God? What God? The injuries and illness did multiple things to my life. I lost the hope of living. It stripped me of my manhood. I couldn't work, couldn't play, everybody had to pitch in and help me all the time. Humiliation. My pride and dignity as well as peace and hope did not exist. I cannot accurately describe what depression feels like. I laid in the bed and went from 250 pounds to 140 pounds in six months. I lost the will to live. I was gonna die and I was indifferent now. Indifference is a dangerous place to be when your hopeless. Anything bad could happen and most of the time it does.

Ever hear of a story in the Bible that a person, who undeserving of Grace is visited by Jesus and a miracle occurs to this wretched undeserving wretch.

Ever hear the story of the last desperate moment of the thief on the cross. How at the last possible moment. Breaths away from damnation, reaches in his self and believes Jesus. He'd had to heard of Jesus. Formed an opinion. But at that time obviously did not accept Jesus as his Messiah, the Son of Man. But i can tell you, desperation and fear make you think more clearly. your feelings are raw and heightened. the Truth exists in that desperation and clarity. It did for the thief. that day he entered Paradise at the explicit order and command of Christ Jesus. Not on a sunny day sitting on a hillside being evangelized by Christ. No, this was as Christ the Innocent Sacrifice was taking the sins that have ever existed or will ever exist upon His mangled body and into Himself to make a way for the thief and everyone that will ever accept the Truth. To acknowledge the Truth that rests in your guts. In your heart. In that place that has no anatomical description. In that moment the plan of Salvation was complete. Christ said so. He said it was done. now we get to look forward to seeing a thief with nail scarred hands greeting us at the door of heaven. He let a scumbag, thieving, killing human waste become the first in Paradise. That is for our benefit. Whoever you are. Whatever you've done. No matter how beaten and broken you are. and especially desperate and hopeless, we are eligible for Salvation just like the thief. Jesus didn't have to offer the thief Salvation, just the moment in history was enough. Just the close vicinity of their crosses made the difference. Just those few sentences established the relationship and Salvation was given by faith. Grace was born. What few sentences have you uttered to Christ today? You ain't like me. Didn't have all that stuff happen and you've got it all together. I wonder if the other thief thought the same thing till he got caught, sentenced and denied the Truth. His last chance too. Today. Now is the time for the people here that are on either cross to accept that gift of Salvation, Forgiveness, Hope, Peace, Wisdom and Purpose. Do it for the first time or pledge again to Christ your love and acceptance of His Sacrifice. His Salvation and promise of eternal life with Him in heaven. Its a blanket deal. Shouldn't nobody be in their seat unless you choose to be the thief that refused. If that's you you are the most important one here tonight. you are loved unconditionally. There is no accident or coincidence you are in a safe place surrounded by people who have been where you are now. No shame in Gods house No shame when we accept that Every Soul matters to God. Every Soul. Every one.

I spent 30 years living without Christ.Injure in 1995. Wheelchair bound. Then I was healed from Hepatitis C in 1998. I was cured of cancer in 1999. No recurrence of either since. I learned to walk after 6 years and two years of therapy. i can walk today. Been walking since 2003. not once did I consider turning my life over to Christ. The pain, the pain meds, the depresson. I was not well. I could go into the deaths of my Mom, my stepdaughter and suicide of my ex-wife but this wouldnt end there. I married again. Running from Truth. i lied and stole. to hide my weakness in handleing all these thing i covered it all up. or thought i did, My wife divorced me because i was a secret keeping, lieing, stealing drug addict and had very self destructive ways. In May 2005 I attempted suicide. I woke days later in the ICU. Jesus was there and I was nailed to a cross. he had captured my attention. No more running. No excuses about how much it hurts. I was desperate and hopeless and inside me the Truth sprang forth. I accepted Christ into my life. I was sober and had a purpose. I walked to the Christ based Men's rehab. Stayed a year. Graduated into a developing relationship with Christ. God put my ex and I togather again. It had to be Him because I wasn't looking for her. She said she had to see it to believe it. Eighteen months later pastor re-married us. i still am an addict but I have over five yearfs clean. my wife and I and the two kids are all Saved and Baptiszed. We love God and to Him give the Glory. There is a happy ending to all our stories that follow Christ. The end is known. Christ sealed that destiny on Calvary. Seal your destiny with Christ today.

Out of Darkness Into The Right

I have a friend. He is a really good guy except for his flaws that have developed over the years and now have come to to destroy his family, estrange his wife and children, place doubt in the hearts of the fence setters and generally follow the patteren of brokeness that either destroys our souls or perhaps even worse, obliterates our witness. Of course of all these things are of harm and despair, the truth is they are the product of sin and the darkness that accompanies the Dark One. This is where we meet Jesus. I have found in my life and through the lives of others that often to see the light you gotta be in a dark place. My friend has found his dark place and by God's mercy and grace he is also seeing the light of Christ as he begins a life long relationship with Jesus.

When I had spent a couple years with the Lord I finally understood. Either I am with Him or I am against Him. A few are called and without hesitation devote their moment to monent life to sharing the Gospel, loving the unloved and truley impacting all people that every soul matters to God.

I come in contact with alot of addicts that want to be former addicts. I know several friends that have walked with Christ on Sunday and drunk on Mondays. Ridicule is punching their ticket for the last train bound to hell. These created beings, our brothers, the most dynamic creation of Gods that we are aware of, envied by Fallen Angels (Demons) and hated by Satan. Who the Bible says seeks only to kill, steal, and destroy us. Why are we so terrifying to Satan that he and his minion joint purpose is to destroy the witness/ testimony of us Christ followers. Satan figured he can't sway us so he will compromise our witness. In doing so our testimony is impotent and words are feeble like an old womans command.

Whomever might read this in the future will think, : why that fella was a nut. flower carring, bald, robe wearing tree hugger. You know with media as it is today and so many diffrent methods of worshiping Christ. Traditions vary church to church, denomination, to denomination. The most ice breaking, hive soothing moment came for me early on at First Assembly NLR. I was given a word from God. I know, scares most folks, they cut and run. The smart ones look it up in the Bible. The uncomfortable spirit I had my first few services there added to the overwhelmed feeling of being like a little bitty fish on a great big hook. Then God removed the scales from my eyes as I entered in the sactuary for the third time and I knew. All these "holy rollin" folks and me came from the same DNA. We all was cut out to serve God and our brothers. NOT LESS THAN THAT, EVER. I was no longer intimidated by being in the presnce of the other people. Those folks, everyone of them, were hellbound at one moment in their lives and in the next they had a responsibility we hardly wrap our minds around.

My life never had purpose or value until the day I was finally empty of any purpose good or bad and my life was filled with a quickening and an unquestionable knowledge that ALL about our Christ is true. My regret is I waisted so much life and health and time, leading folks astray that I pray for the honor to serve God in His desired fashion. The words from God, "good job loving me" is all that I desire. I have come to know that in this place we live, there is no other calling, deportment, attitude, respect, or condition that has an all encompassing cure. !00% successs rate since the beginning to the end of time. It is the least risky, unnessesarily speculative gut feeling that we all have. The call of Jesus. The active and deliberate acceptance or denial of the greatest truth and honor bestoyed upon Man. To utter the word's I work, I live for you Lord. Thats the beginning of a beautiful love beween Creator and His creation.

I will go into why I think a third of the Angels and Satan hated us so badly that his pride could not allow him to worship God because, Envy, Pride and contempt filled the spirits of all that have fallen. Why, Why'd God go and make us if He knew it was just gonna be a failure? By selfless service, unconditional love, forgiveness, and it's all true whats in that ancient book called Bible. Yeah Right. But that's the perfect beauty. It is all and everything God and Jesus and the Spirit has promissed, guarenteed. Told stories of 1500 years before they happened and it all came true and is still the only truth, the only way.

I will leave this. The truth is in you. You know it is true. When God made us I think he put an ability in us to know His truth's. The bible says it is written in us. The moment in time for each of God's miracles always occurs at the exactly correct moment. Broken or not, God supplies our every need, my supernatural history with Christ is the unbreakable, unconditional love He has for me. That I can only respond with worship, adoration, praise and surrender to creater of the all. The significant reality that I and many others are Loved by God. We beat up the whole: who me? Saved< Forgiven< Innocent< Forgotten< Fertile, Hungry for Redeemption, Yearning to complete our purpose ; The Will Of God. Simple. Plain Instructions, Translated for the more Educated, Complete, without error, just one catch, Love the God who Loves You Unconditionally. Love your neighbor as yourself.

This Is Difficult

No matter how wealthy, powerful, pleased, proud and satisfied, you loose without God. We win. We have God.

How does that statement make you feel?

Every Soul Matters To God. Even his.

I was uncomfortable.

Somewhere in the Bible there's a part about being unmoved watching others never knowing Jesus. Something about not seeking to introduce the lost to Christ. Which is about the best way I can think of to worship and honor God. Service to God service to others. Service to God.

I have found that the desire to serve God does not ensure that we will be successful. I fail.
All the time. My desire is strong, the hard part for me how? I would love seeing a billboard on I-30 saying how to do it right in 30 days, 1-800-NO1Fail.

I am struggling. I am anxious, exhausted and sustained. I am in the position that I must trust Him to survive this.

I have never had elevated expectations of myself. I was and am , to a degree, still painfully shy, introverted, awkward. I had and have still low self esteem and struggle to find purpose. To know me ten years ago it would have been obvious. Today not so much. I struggle still but I have Jesus. The difference between fright, misery, and fear and knowing the Truth, Grace and Hope that relationship with Christ produces.

I've been a Christ follower for five years and a Christ "knower" since 1973. I was 12. I knew Jesus but to do all those things seemed impossible. Church was no fun. Every week i was going to hell. So I played so hard the other six days just in case I went to hell on the 7th. That's how I remember it anyways. The best part of Church was when the Preacher give that last long prayer I'd slip outta Mom, Dad and my pew and ease up to Grandma and Grandpa's. As soon as the preacher reached the front doors and said amen me and Grandpa split out the side door, get in his Doodle Bug as he called it and headed to Grandma's and his house. We was fixin to eat. This forced Mom and Papa to come too. Genius.

I have learned that the period of time between knowing the name of Jesus and following Jesus is often a long time . I wonder if there is purpose in that statistic? Is it possible that we are (for lack of a better word) numb to the extreme urgency which we are in simply because Jesus is just a word to us? To the others? How can we communicate or reveal the most real, pursuing danger, evil that seeks to destroy us that is effectively invisible to the very peoples we desire to reveal it to?

I have been trying to hang onto pride. The only way to lose my pride is to tell the truth about me. The most difficult part of faithful is in the moment. It is a battle and takes effort and I am weak. Once saw things about life a much different way than today. Today there is hope. I never knew what hope was it was till I run up on it. Never knew what to truly believe in anything until I saw the intervention of my God begin in my life and has never yet stopped. There is a seamless presence of God in my life. I believe. it is such a change from being who I was once.

I want so badly to tell to others exactly what God has done to my my life. I am not good at knowing how to do that. I mean there's the story. Its a long one. I told you God showed up in my poor, broken existence and He changed my world. Its the best story in the world to me cause its how I surrendered to Christ. Surrender daily is the key. Gotta have a gonna serve Christ attitude and God does the rest, guaranteed.

The Bible promises in Psalms 34:18 The lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. As for myself, that pretty much sums me up. The deeper I look in me the greater the need for Jesus. Then I find it harder to serve Him because of me. It seemed as at the very moment I began a life with Christ. It ain't like it was. Life has become a montage of obstacles, traps. snares, pitfalls, distractions, temptations and shinny things. It really is hard to see a great volume of of the presence and reverence to Christ when I stand and look around. Here there's the Slick and Polished for me. If I am committed to follow Christ, and I am struggling and the Bible tells us plainly that we should have expected it, read the Book. I figure most others are also.

Lord I feel pressured, inadequate and fearful. I need your help dealing with everything that has come against me. I know your word says I am . I love you. I worship you. My only desire is to serve you. I need that strength of Jesus today. I need your presence and peace.

First Things First

Earlier this morning I was setting in my chair. Beside my bookcase. Lots of books, file folders. memorabilia. The bookshelves contents were 99.2% Christian oriented items. Bibles, commentaries, dictionaries. Cute figurines with nice bible verses on them. The .8% left over goes to the weighty ball chromed out skull.It came on my cane. That's another story. A couple of years ago I went to several Narcotics Anonymous meetings in town. I really tried to hang with the message and the people. I kept looking for hope and the affirmation that Christ makes us successful in what he planned for us If we follow him. I got the vibe that it wasn't gonna happen around a lot of pissed off folks.. These were angry people. Whole lot of despair, anger, no victories. One night before I left the meeting I purchased a book. This morning I opened that book. On the inside cover of the book I had written several years ago, disheartened by not fitting in at those meetings. Hurting, angry and anxious. I wrote:

1. I am not God. Stop trying to act like it

2. I am unable to become the person he intended me to be without first, knowing and believing in

#1. Secondly I must shut up and listen for my Lords whisper that comforts me.

3. I must constantly be aware that because of the brokenness of and choices I have made I must

live a life in which my God's Grace is sufficient in all things. My choices will determine my

eternity. Jesus is with me.

4. The moment that I feel the "satisfaction", "pride" or an "anonymous victory" in my recovery,

my ability to effectively help another is lost Got to get that outta me o me.I have to

#1, #2, #3, and #4. Hit my knees on the floor. Pray and cry and groan. Submit

SUBMIT

myself as a willing and humbled sacrifice excited of the prospect of God's will coarsing

in me as I get to serve God Himself. I need "humbilization" before I go forward.

It was designed by God to be about the thems. It is ALL about Jesus. It is not about me. It is

all about being God's child. When I read the Bible there ain't nothing better.

5. Hardest part is to remain teachable. Its hard to admit shortcomings, inabilities and weakness.

Be humble. Live weak. I know where my strength comes from.

6. There is no coincidence I survived to live this day. God's Grace got me here. Don't waist it.

Confessions Of What Is Real

This has been happening to me for along time and I am in pain. I come around the corner the other day and run up on Jesus. He had been a long time coming and His timing is Perfect. I owe everything to the Grace and Salvation of my Master, Wise Council, King. All that is Is You. I want to throw myself at your feet and worship and adore you Jesus. I crave to be in your presence, where I feel You best. I have been in a cursed life bound for hell. Then I met the Truth. The moment I met God, in my life I knew He is the Only Truth. My Christ. My King.

WHAT IT IS WE KNOW THAT IS TRUE ABOUT OUR KING, OUR CHRIST, MAN OF SUFFERING. MY SAVIOR IS REAL. ALWAYS BEEN. ALWAYS BE. MY KING. I KNOW IT IN MY GUTS. THAT'S ALSO WHY YOU DO NOT FEEL IT THEIR WHEN IT IS NOT.

If anyone hasn't told you, When you choose Christ as Lord and Savior, that's not the end. That's the beginning.

I want to record the things that are happening in my life. I want to in any way leave a record of Christ in my life. My personal Jesus. Savior. Truth. Answer.

Before I get started on that I have a friend and his wife from our church that are troubled on my heart. A couple weeks ago in Sunday School I find that he is stricken with a rare and inoperable brain cancer. All my Sunday School members were making these cute get well and hope you feel better cards. I asked what they were doing and I learned about my friends illness. I felt horrible for just not knowing. I just couldn't bring myself to make this card. I just couldn't. This morning, here in the middle of all the crazy stuff going on around my life I feel inspired to write them a note. " I will leave their names absent in respect". I rote their names and said, "What can I say? Ain't no word's is there? You know how to go through this. You gotta love Him and you gotta love him. You have to grow closer and wiser during this time. I know it sounds counter-intuitive but now is the time to grow. Alot of it. You don't want what's happening to yall but you cannot be successful without it.

You know it ain't ever crazy doing what God's got us to tend to, even when it does seem that way.

Only secret I know of is Praise God. Praise Him. Worship him. Cry to Him and yell at Him and let yourself be exhausted of your efforts at the feet of Jesus and in His time He shall turn your tragedies into His victories. Y'all in a win/win situation. Y'all can do this. It makes us who we will be. These are your moments to be as you are so you can become who you shall be.

Sometimes I find it fascinating can't take it all in. BUT I KNOW IT. IT'S ALL TRUE. IT'S ALL REAL. EVERYTHING THE BIBLE SAYS IS THE TRUTH. AIN'T GONNA BE BUT ONE WAY AND THAT'S HIS WAY. That Truth is your comfort. That Truth's all it takes. That Truth's all there is.

Your in a fight your scarce readied for but you know how to fight and you know who has the Victory. I love you guys so much, you make me grow.

It'salways Best I Heed My Own Advice

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Hey Sue nice to hear from you and actually its nice to hear the type of problems your expressing. Ive led a less than desirable life before Christ and have had many problems, most of which I was responsible for. Now when I hear mysel;f saying that I want to be more connected to my Church, ny Church Family and feel a responsibility to ones that are influenced by my choices and convictions, I have to say there is no better burden than the burden for Christ.

It sounds like you are well equipped to handle the burden that your responsibility of faith requires. A while back I realized that i had developed a habit of looking at most everything in my life through the filter of Christ. What my marriage means to me and how I am devoted to my wife without reservation or an "exit strategy" and the desire and determination to help lead my kids to Christ had become the focal center of my purpose. What you are describing is so similar. You describe being sold out to Christ and have a burden for your daughter and husband. Christ also knows exactly what your burden and content of your heart are. He is well equipped to assist you in your effort to help develope you family into life lonf followers of Christ. Remember the parable about how we are to sow the seed and Christ will water and nurture it to fruition? Sister you do what the Christ in your heart commands. Do you endear your daughter to Christ if she fully resists and is despondent at the notion of going to Church. In my post i briefly described my mother's word to me, everytime I saw her. She would say, "you need to be in Church". I would say "i know" and kiss her on the head and go on about my life. I can guarantee you this, she never once missed Church because I didn't go. She never tried to pacify me or entice me to come to Church with anything other than the truth."You need to be in Church". My momma died and in the Church that we had the service in was the first Church Id been in since 1977.

i was the type of person that is shaped by extremes in my life. For me to turn my life over to Christ I had to loose everything. I mean living in the homeless shelters, no money , no family. i had to be hopeless, broken and desperate. in my despair I tried to take my own life. it was unsuccsessful and it was at that first moment of consciousness that i was primed and ready for Christ to be my Salvation. Now I'm not saying that that is the solution for your daughter and husband. I describe the call of Christ like this, Jesus has a "secret combination" of events that he "dials in" in our lives. He invites us to accept His gift of savation many times during our lives. He positions us so that we can CHOOSE.
The Bible says that God would have it that none should perish but all should come to know Him as their Savior. I know that its a heartbreaking feeling that our loved ones are struggling, not understanding the serious and eternally important consequences of their tarrying attitude towards Christ. I know this, I cannot tell anyone anything, but I can show them. Sue, you go to Church. You be a prayer warrior for your daughter and husband. You be the leader God intends to the ones that choose to listen to your Christ given leadership and wisdom. You spread the message of a need for prayer to your Church family. You immerse yourself in the Word. You live a life that emmulates Christ to the very best of your abilities. I believe the only reason I am alive today, a Christ follower and writing this to you is that my mother took me to Church when I was a child and she continued to grow in Christ and never ever compromised her beliefs for fear of "losing" me.
The only chance I had was her prayers and mantra that continually rang in my ears,"I love You And You Need To Be In Church. You know the way. Go for it. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. In Christ, Patrick Franke